Well, Hello and Happy Friday. This has been an eventful week, full of meetings to attend, workouts to accomplish, and the regular stuff of life to fit in around it all. To anyone who reads this and is a Mom, greetings and salutations in advance of Mothers Day. To all of you who manage to do your best by your families, who try to do your best for yourselves, and manage, against all time constraints, to make the world a better place by spreading love, soothing hurt feelings, maintaining yourselves, and trying to be good to your friends and co-workers, you are a fabulous bunch and deserve hugs all around. So I hope you feel my arms encircling you and pulling you close for a moment. You make the world a better place.
Some of you may notice that my picture has changed. Please take a moment to take a good look at it. It was an early Mother's day present. You will note it is a frog in workout duds--athletic shoes, wristbands, and a towel to wipe away the sweat. The perfect accompaniment for this bit of fluff. This frog appears to already be in much better shape than I am in, but I am working my way toward those trim legs. So take a moment to get acquainted with my stand-in, making her image big enough to see in detail. What a find!
Just as I manage to conquer the workout that Laurie assigns me, there are new things to add, new weightier weights to use, new routines and machines to get acquainted with. What makes it easier to adapt is that Laurie, while dispensing grueling workouts, also dispenses smiles and encouragement and tells me that I did well. I really don't want to disappoint her, so I keep doing what I'm doing, and attempt to make her proud. Wishing that she had been around earlier in my life does not make it so, and that was yesterday. I am learning that it is never too late to get into better shape. I used to take the same walk around the park with Lucy every morning, at the same speed and intensity. Since I have been working out, I take the reverse route, just a bit more up strenuous, more uphill, and a bit faster than before. And it is easier and I am less out of breath. The last hill that I used to walk down on the other route, I now walk up at the end of the walk. At first it was a bear, and I stopped halfway up. This morning, I noticed that for the first time, I didn't really notice the incline and I wasn't out of breath. Definitely progress, no? Then later, after I plan the weekend, I will go to the gym, walk another mile and do all the upper body strengthening routines that I still have to do. However, I have been paying so much attention to the workouts, that I have kind of lost my attention to the nutrition part of the game.
So, today, I will start again to record my meals and water. It makes one more mindful. I realized that I have forgotten to take in any liquid during the day except what I drink after my workout. This is not good. Making time for the physical part of the program and attending to them has diverted my attention. Now I have to get back on the nutrition bandwagon. After all, it was Paulette who started this whole thing. I have remained faithful to the promise to stay away from bread for awhile, but I have to admit, that now and then a sweet creeps up and jumps on board. So mindfulness is the name of the game, and writing down what I eat, recording good days and maintenance days, as opposed to binge days, is really important. Breakfast is not a problem and since I don't seem to crave variety at breakfast, the oatmeal with berries and almonds is fine for the long term. Even dinner is OK. It's the rest of the lunch and post lunch day that seems to be more problematic. So I will follow Casi's lead and pack a lunch. It makes the most sense. Last weekend, I got so over-hungry for lunch, that I couln't stop eating all afternoon. But while my weight has remained stable, I am thrilled to report that my body is changing shape. I am fitting into things I have not worn for a couple of years and were languishing at the back of my closet. (The next step is the give-away pile) I am even developing shoulders! So all of you "mature" ladies out there, there are biceps and triceps in there just waiting to be discovered, not to mention abs. All we have to do is look for them. So jump on that treadmill that is functioning as a clothesrack, unearth that Nordic Track, take a walk, get a balance ball, just do something that you didn't do yesterday because you were too stiff. Start light and work up and don't forget to stretch afterward, and be sure to BREATHE. I tend to hold my breath, so I am reminding you.
Again, Happy Mother's Day. Give yourself a pat on the back, or take a walk in the gardens that are all around us, take a hike, make a healthy meal, just treat yourself well. You deserve it!
PS Get a buddy who encourages you and cheers you on. It really helps. Thanks Laurie.

Getting Organized

Today was the day I finally got organized. Already into the game, I was finding, or rather losing, lots of the papers that I have just been stuffing into my original folder that I got on the night of the original award. I was forever looking for stuff, so today I put everything into a divided accordian folder with slots for medical results, nutrition, appointments, charts I should be keeping in a more organized way, fitness, recipes etc. What a relief. I had lost track of my recipes and was wandering through my kitchen searching for them, and finally I got so frustrated, I just sat down at my desk and started excavating to get everything organized and put away, and there were the recipes. Since I have never cooked anything at my desk, I don't know what they were doing there.
Well, I have to report that the good results that I am getting are getting noticeable. My daughter say I walk differently, and while I feel that I have better balance and am walking faster and stronger, I hadn't realized it was noticeable. I have convinced my husband that he needs to exercise, and today he took the first step by calling to find a place near his work where he could get some water therapy. I am just thrilled. Already a force for good is happening. I have noticed that I feel stronger. I have also noticed that taking a day off is not sloth, but a needed regeneration. With the new upper body exercises, my shoulder was hurting, and I was feeling like "am I going to have to be in pain for six months while I get in shape?" But Lorrie had said that the strength training should not be on consecutive days, so a day off in between took care of the pain. Also, I decided to add a two mile walk on Saturday afternoon to my regular morning walk with Lucy my dog, and I wore us both out. So on Saturday night I went to the gym so I couold rearrange my schedule, met Dave there, and we had the whole place to ourselves. Balancing on the BoSu ball was nearly impossible, and walking the treadmill without holding on was also not in the cards. So on Sunday, Lucy and I just had our morning play session, and took the rest of the day off. But guess what. Yesterday when I went to the gym, I could balance for almost the whole 30 seconds! "Look ma, no hands" and I was able to walk the treadmill also no hands at my regular speed. Lorrie had said to back off the speed if I needed to. Wow, was I jazzed by that great leap forward. OK, so it's not such a great leap, but it felt like it. I have to be satisfied that each of us has to go at our own pace. Do you notice a change in your shape? Look for it, it is there.
I woke up this morning thinking that having a group that we are working with, even though we don't see each other, is a really good thing. The group dynamic wants us to help each other, and not to let the others down by not working at the program. I guess that is why groups that make you accountable are so successful, like Weight watchers and Alcoholics anonymous are so successful. We all have our moments, but I have to remember, that if you work the program it works. I think that is a paraphrase from something they say in AA. There are so many people rooting for us, I have to remember to root for myself. How about you? By the way, a lot of the recipes call for lemons and lemon juice, and I have a tree that just gives and gives, so if you need lemons, let me know.

I have to go to the gym now, so I will just say bye for now. Keep up the good work,

Things I'm learning from CHLI

Wow, what a way to clear my head and think straight. Exercise, who'd have thought it. It makes me wonder why jocks aren't more self-reflective. Perhaps it is because they are fixated on winning and ore not in it for the "high".
It is really interesting to be the focus of attention. I don't think I have ever before had such concentrated attention. There is not only instruction about how to do things that will enhance my well-being, physical as well as psychological, but a key factor for me has also been something I will have to call permission. Heretofore, I have to admit that concentrating on myself has been something I have not done thinking that I was behaving "selffishly." And I don't think that anyone really equates selfishness with something positive. But if we turn that around a bit, and look at it from a different angle, taking good care of oneself can be quite generous It makes me better able to do the things that I do for my family. It makes me a more alert and aware citizen who is better equipped to handle emergencies, and is not a drag on the economy because I need more services. Good health and good cheer is contagious, just as unhappiness and depression are. So isn't it better to pass on the positive rather than the negative?
So I want to list here some of the positives that I have noticed about myself now that I am getting exercise and eating better. First, I am happy to report that I have lost 5 pounds since April 2 when I had my first resting metabolic rate. Not too bad. Also, I have added afternoon exercise to my routine, something I had never thought I could "fit into " my day. That was one of the things that Suzi and I spoke about, that by calendaring time for my needs, I was putting myself on the list. I have spent a lifetime fitting my needs into whatever time was left over, and we all know that there is never any time left over. Those little Kaizen steps really work.
By now, I have met with Sherri, my personal trainer, and have started stretching at home. I really did not realize how tight some of my muscles were and that this was the reason for alot of my stiffness and not just age encroaching. It is good to see that there are remedies, not that the body doesn't age, because it certainly does, and things wear out, but we can keep limber in the face of it. And we don't have to emit that grunt when we get out of the car or up off the couch. It just isn't so much of an effort anymore.
Also, people who have been home for a while, or should I not generalize about that and just say that since I have been working at home rather than going out to an office, I got a bit too comfortable at home, to the point of becomming a bit leery of new experiences. It was becomming too big an effort to try something new, or go someplace unfamiliar. Oh sure, I would say "sure, I'll come" and then as I was getting dressed to go, I would hear myself whining in my head about wanting to stay home, and not have to bother to put my best foot forward, or put my foot into unfamiliar waters. I wonder if it is the fear of being judged and found wanting.
I always tell my daughters to get dressed and made up so that you are so satisfied with your appearence that you can forget about it and focus on the new people you are meeting and the new situation you are being introduced to. Good advice ? It always seemed so, but I know that when you don't feel your best, it's hard to get to that place. Now that I am taking off some of the weight, even a small amount so that my clothes fit more comfortably, it's easier to take that advice from myself. Now that I am more comfortable walking and standing up straight, I feel like I present a more confident person in the world.
Also, I referred a couple of days ago to being more alert. It's probably all that fresh oxygenated blood to the brain thats making me better. It's also a few other things: knowing that I can accomplish great things a small step at a time, even though I have done that sometimes in my life, knowing that it is an actual method of getting things accomplished that is tried and true is comforting.
Another valuable lesson that is a mental shift is from the nutrition part of the program. If we are trying to lose weight and sticking to a 1500 calorie diet for example, eating an extra cookie for example doesn't make us weak and shouldn't muske us feel as if we've "blown it". That too often leads to further blowing it. If we've had an extra, that may make that day a maintenance day, rather than a losing day. It doesn't make it a "bad" day, or me a bad person or a weak person or a loser, it just means that I went over the limit for weight loss, and stepped for a moment into the maintenance area, so if I want to continue to lose, I have to step back. I hope that this makes sense to you, that I have explained it adequately, because it have made a huge difference for me. It has meant that I am not either ON THE PROGRAM or OFF THE PROGRAM, but that I am on the program with a small deviation for today, and tomorrow ( or the next meal or whatever)I will still be on the program-- not that I was off the program, or wagon, and have to fight to get back on. I AM on, and I will be on, and I can step away for a moment, and step right back.

getting to know me

Well folks and frogs, I have been getting reacquainted with my body over the last week. I feel as if we had been estranged from each other for ---well, let's say for a very long time now. I have been walking with Lucy in the morning for several years now, and I actually did it the Kaizen way, by first walking from the place where we played to the trash can to dispose of --well you know. Then when they moved the trash can, I walked a bit further to get there. Then when they took the can away altogether, at first I got in the car and held the bag out the window and drove around the park to another trash can, but after a while I began to think about adding the trashcan to our walk and so on, until I was walking the whole mile course around the park. Some days I would try to walk again in the afternoon, but found it either too hot, or too late by the time I got around it it, so I really didn't do it all that often. Even when I began to go to the nutritionist, I did'nt add much exercise to the mix, just started eating less.
But with the winning of Project Transformation, I made myself an oath to really dive into this with all four feet--remember, frogs have four feet. So I have followed the regimen of going to the gym and doing only cardio walking on the treadmill for that week for 20 minutes and the first day I was really bored. But the next day I had kind of figured out the treadmill and liked it a bit better, and I felt stronger and better, and b y Friday, I was feeling even better. I have to admit I took the weekend off, there was some of that apprehension that I had initially, about walking into something new. I know that there would be a lot more people around on the weekend and I wasn't really ready for that yet.
Yesterday, Monday I began a new week. As I am still learning how to go about this and fitting it into my life, I didn't make provisions for a light lunch, and ended up getting overly hungry and then eating potato chips. But I learned that I have to figure in some food. I am amazed at how good I feel just adding that extra 20 minutes of walking and how strong and energetic I feel. All those endorphins rushing around in my system. I am getting so much done at home too. I am doing things that have been on my "to do " list for ever, except now they are checked off. I am sleeping better and more soundly and I feel great.
Now, here is the kicker and why I wrote today. I also feel more mentally alert. I guess it is all that extra circulation that is bringing more blood to my brain. I have to recommend what I am doing to you. To feel physically stronger and mentally alert. What a combo! Of course there is still a long way to go, and I have yet to meet with my personal trainer. I will be meeting with her every week, and I suppose adding and varying my workout. Today is a pretty gloomy day, but Lucy and I walked, then I came home, cleaned the kitchen, did the laundry, and broke up the boxes that need to go into recycling and have been sitting out on the side of the house for weeks. I will spend some time brushing up on my language lessons that I have let languish, then a light lunch and off to the gym. I can see how this becomes addictive. How can it not when I feel so good. I think that it is the good feelings that are so addictive. I want to talk to the rest of the group and find out if they are feeling the same things. I think that maybe you had to have been estranged from your body for a while to feel this euphoria at reunification.
I wish I could explain more adequately how I feel. I didn't even realize how divorced I was from my physical self. It was like being a crab that changes containers as they grow. As I changed clothing sizes, the real me was left behind and I am finding myself. Not that the sizes have changed yet, it;s only the second week, but I feel as if I am on the road home.